Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Love is Way More Than Sex - Two Men Speak

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I have said it before that I'm tiring of the relationship between Olivia and the President in Scandal, an American TV show. At first, Atala wondered if it was my conservative side kicking in because they were basically committing adultery, but it wasn't it. I explained that since the first few episodes where they were portrayed as star crossed lovers living separate lives with broken hearts, these days their relationship was all about the sex. For a romantic like me, love is more than sex. If I cannot connect with you emotionally, then the sex is just a physical urge any other man, or even a sex toy, can satisfy.

In his review of the episode of Scandal that put a stop to my Ollie/Fitz fanclub membership, Harry wrote about the dangers of tying love too close to sex,

...I think the Writers should explore other angles to their love. 80% of the time we see Fitz and Olivia expressing their love to each other is when they are having sex. To me, it just means that Mellie is bad in bed and Olivia is compensating. The writers should explore dialogues and use events to show that the love they have for each other is way more than the sex... because to me I feel once the sex starts to suck, the love won’t prevail.

Abstinence and Love - From a Man's Point of View

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Yesterday, the dear myne post went up and brought in some really illuminating comments from Chukky Eboka, who went into a lot of detail to explain his stand. While I do not completely agree with him, I do see many valid points he makes, some of which I've blogged about before. I have shared some excerpts from his view point below;

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. I'm offering up opinion from a male perspective- but here we have all these women telling us how we should feel. I'm quite sure the guy in question will be in the same age range as me, and he is in the UK just as I am. I can share a lot of how he feels- and i am explaining it to her. but the problem with relationships is that we never listen to the opposite side.

Pray tell me of some other way an upwardly mobile, intelligent, fast paced lifestyle young heterosexual male has to establish his territory around a particular female he fancies. any way you come up with will no doubt be some vanilla experience that only a woman can devise and which a man can replicate with his multitude of friends male or female.

Giving Love A Second Chance - Short Story

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“Eyamba?” He called.

I didn’t respond. I wanted to scream, hit him – anything to dispel the raging emotions I was feeling. How could he come back after all this time and ask this of me. Just when I was picking up the pieces of my broken heart, just as I was getting my life back on track. In that moment I considered all the hurtful things I could say to him – to give him a taste of how I felt and what I thought of him and his stupid request. In a flash my mind went over the course of events that had led us to this place- the threshold of divorce; the death of our beautiful baby boy.

The night he left, I remember sitting at the dining table thinking about how much he had changed. About how in the 3 years we’d been married or in the 2 years we’d dated I’d never seen this side of my husband. It’d been 8 months since we lost our son and I still didn’t know what my husband was thinking or how he was feeling; in all that time I’d tried to reach out to him, but he treated me like the enemy, like it was my fault our little boy was gone. I knew I couldn’t stop trying, so I walked up to where he sat on the couch and stroked his head, like I used to do when we first got married.

Chiwetel Ejiofor - February Man Candy #19

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 Chiwetel Ejiofor is an actor, and will be playing Odenigbo in the Half of A Yellow Sun movie.

Monday, February 18, 2013

Diane Oputa on Love and Marriage - Keep it Fresh

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I blogged about them earlier this month after Charly Boy planned a second honeymoon trip for them as a gift for her latest birthday. Now Diane Oputa, Charly Boy's wife has granted an interview in which she talks about being the one to propose to Charly Boy after a few years of dating. She said;

I dated Charles for a few years before I proposed to him to marry me, else I would leave. He was getting too comfortable with just dating me because marriage wasn’t really on his mind. You know, he hasn’t been lucky in that department. During my first visit to Nigeria, I met his wonderful family and it was clear he was coming from a very strict Christian background. His family was a very spiritual one with high sense of morality and values, there was no way some of that wouldn’t have robbed off on Charles. I just fell in love with him and his close knit family. Since then, they have been ever so kind and loving to me. I just thank God.

Read the rest of the interview below;

Love Like A Movie - Red Carpet Video and Photos

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Well, I've seen more pictures and a video of the Love Like a Movie concert and I'm so impressed. Congrats to Darey and his wife/ Soul Muzik for putting together the amazing show. I see that he performed to acting from stage acrobats, I guess that's where the movie part comes in. I will be seeing Cirque du Soleil myself this week so I know if I had been in Lagos, I would have attended the event for their sake alone. Also, let me not lie, I am a Darey fan and he is one of my man candys :)

BTW, someone called me a hater in the comments to my earlier post about Kim K in Nigeria. I wrote how it doesn't make sense to me how short her appearance was, and the fact that she's a reality TV star and did nothing in particular at the show. I'm not hating, but some people in their comments have let me realize how many Nigerian women of the sort to attend the show, see Kim Kardashian as aspirational. OK, I see, and I apologize to her fans. And after all, it is their money to spend how they like :)

Anyway, enjoy the video and more pictures below;

Nse Marries Clifford Sule Rocking Her Big Puffy Afro

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Nse marries Clifford Sule

True to reports, Nse Ikpe Etim got married in a Valentine wedding. For her civil ceremony marriage to beau, Clifford Sule, Nse wore her natural hair in a big Afro held up at the sides with golden accessories. I'm so loving it! I was seriously thinking of cutting my hair this weekend after I heard my last stylist quit the salon, but this Nse's hair is giving me life.

The way she rocked it the next day at a reception with close friends including Rita Dominic, Waje, Thelma Ojiji, Uche Jombo, Dakore Akande and Michelle Dede, was extra super. In the pictures below, you can see how she pulled it up all the way into a fierce mohawk!

10 Ways to Know Your Boyfriend is Husband Material

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1. They don’t make fun of your taste in music/pop culture/entertainment. (Well, a little teasing is fine, but they shouldn’t be seriously judging you over it.)

2. They encourage and support you in pursuing your dreams in life.

3. You feel welcome and comfortable around their family — even if no future in-laws are perfect.

4. There aren’t any secrets between the two of you, or things about yourselves which you feel you need to seriously hide from one another.

5. They are proud of you.

6. There is no pressure for either of you to adhere to strict, completely outdated gender roles — or a feeling that, if you don’t, the other isn’t attracted to you anymore.

Dear Myne - He said I Used him and now Treats me Badly

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I have been following your blog for a while and I am a fan especially on the Dear Myne segment. Please I need different opinions on what is currently going on in my life so I could make a decision especially from your people who follow you as I find them quite mature. Ok here goes my story, quite long but please indulge me.

While I was in the university, I dated this guy, I am a born again christian but he isn't but I loved him. He is actually a good guy. We broke up after service due to mainly distance and slight misunderstandings.

When he came back to Lagos after service, he tried to reconnect but I was already dating someone else but he kept on. He persisted until he traveled to the UK for his Masters on scholarship. Before he traveled, he told me to wait for him that he was going to come back because I was single as at the time he was living. He even introduced me to his folks but I wasn't comfortable with the distance thing. Long distance has never been my thing.

Peter Okoye - February Man Candy #18

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Looking for pics to showcase Peter Okoye, I had to restrain myself to just these ones. Peter Okoye is one half of a music duo PSquare, and they are among the biggest and most entertaining performers, with their influence extending to most of Africa and outside. Of course, we can't forget that he's a domestic Nigerian man, he is taken and has two children.