Monday, May 19, 2014

Do You Remember Your Firsts With Your Partner?

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By Nkem Akinsoto

The online and long distance beginnings of my relationship with Atala is legend by now [Read Here], but suffice to say, we met for the first time already having deep feelings for each other which we refused to call love, and we lived thousands of miles and continents apart.

The first time he came to see me, he was living in Seattle and I in Edinburgh Scotland. He spent a week and it was really great. The visit gave me enough ample time to show him all the sights and we did all the touristy things available. We also had time to talk and really get in tune with each other. Though it was his first trip to Scotland, Atala had lived in the UK before so it wasn't too strange for him.

The first time we spent in Nigeria together was a different story. This was his first time in Nigeria in several years, and his first time that far east of Nigeria. Again, I was his hostess and tour guide, but this time things were not so cushy for him. To say the least, this put something of a strain on us and our fledgling relationship. And guess what, we were already planning our wedding!

I have to say that planning the wedding came with its own palava too, nobody is ever too happy when they are spending money and not seeing what it is getting in concrete terms. Atala was spending money, I was spending, and yet it seemed our parents wanted more and more each day, for one list item, or the other thanksgiving party.

But I have to admit that working through those issues that came up and learning how to deal with our new in-laws back then has stood us in good stead as our marriage has progressed. And on some of those few days we spent in Asaba, we took the time to drive round and have a feel of the location, visiting the banks of the River Niger, crossing over the bridge, and so on.

What about you guys? Do you remember sharing any firsts with your partner (or past boyfriends/girlfriends)? Do share...


  1. Greetings! Very helpful advice in this particular post! It's the little changes that make the greatest changes.

    Thanks for sharing!

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  2. Talking firsts......

    I remember the first time I said I loved her. There was a flash in her eyes that brightened up the poorly lit street. Maybe it was just NEPA oh. Lolz.

    Anyways, it's been hard to stop ever since. :D


    1. That is so sweet! Congrats! I pray the love continues forever :)

  3. Aawww Myne, the love between you two is so beautiful. I'm sure it's not perfect but it sure is beautiful.

    In order to answer your question I'll need a partner... So this post isn't for me. LOL.

    1. Thanks dear, and I'm sure you have many stories! LOL...

  4. Lovely posts! My hubby and I celebrated our 3rd year together and am thankful. I am also happy and excited when I see beautiful relationships like gives me hope

  5. Lovely posts! My hubby and I celebrated our 3rd year together and am thankful. I am also happy and excited when I see beautiful relationships like gives me hope

    1. Hello Cherico, thanks for your kind words. I pray for your marriage too and it will grow from strength to strength.

  6. Asaba!!

    I remember a lot of firsts.....reading this made me think back on them....and smile :-)


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