Monday, April 21, 2014

[Please Advice] One Year of No Sex With My Wife - Should I Consider Divorce?

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I'm a 30 year old man, I've have been together with my wife for about 6 years and 3 years married. No kids, no house. The upcoming July will mark the 1st year anniversary of Not having sex. I can tell you that before that 1 year mark, sex was maybe once every 2 weeks.

Would have liked to have it more often but it satisfied me. And every time i initiated it, adding to it, about 90% of the time i ALWAYS initiated the courting. I remember getting into arguments about who initiates it first (ridiculous).

**A side note to women**- Its a misconception to assume that every man likes to be dominant in sex and to be always initiating it, thats not Entirely true. As a man, it pleased me when my wife desired me and approached me for sex. Its sad that things are not the way it used to be. I've never cheated and nor do i plan on it. And its sad that i know that its almost going to be a year without sex with my wife.

Divorce has been on my mind, and continuous to make an appearance in my thought from time to time. Im glad i found this thread. Let me know what you think. I'll be gladly to answer to any comment or question.


  1. What led to the No-sex? You both must have been at each others necks,quarelling and nagging yourselves. This snuffed the joy out of the relationship. Sex is an elixir in marriage. When there is good sex, quarrels are less, misunderstandings are easily settled. What I would advise is that you both swallow your pride and get talking. Talk about the things that hurt you about each other. How can the kids come when there is no sex? You need to fall in love with each other all over again please.....

  2. I feel your pain. Try harder, communicate, tease, date, foreplay. Actually, try therapy too if you're abroad. I'm sure there's some option for therapy in Nigeria too.
    No sex happens in a relationship, but at the young age of 30 you're not finding it funny, and that is completely understandable.

  3. No kids and no house. Those are the things worrying her big time. Work on getting a house, provide for her and see how she will turn around.

  4. I want to know, what does this man mean by No House? Do they live apart then, or are they homeless?

  5. Why don't you sit your wife down ask her what she thinks the future of the marriage is. For all you know, she might have some grievances against you. For all you know, she sef might be thinking divorce. You cannot proceed with reconciliation until the problem is identified. No sex in a marriage (unless medical conditions) = dead marriage. Nigerian women like to tell sex starved women to dress provocatively etc. Useless advice most times but in your case I will also say work on making yourself desirable to her. Buff yourself up and start walking around in trunks :). Let's see if she will make the first move.

  6. I tot he said he would answer questions, where is he?


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