Saturday, April 27, 2013

Is the Other Woman Sometimes Needed?

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By Mgcini Nyoni

A friend of mine – a female friend, one day told a stunned group of colleagues that the ‘small house’ (a married man’s girlfriend), actually strengthens marriages, contrary to popular belief that ‘small houses’ are home wreckers. She gave three reasons for her conclusions:

One: If a good man cheats, he compensates for his bad deed by treating his wife extremely well; a descending wife will realise that this is the time to put in all the requests and they will all be fulfilled. A lot of people will question why I am saying, if a good man cheats when almost everyone is agreed that a man who cheats on his wife is a bad man: The definition of a good man goes beyond whether he cheats or not and in most cases whether he cheats or not does not even factor into his qualification of good or bad.

The cheating moments in a man’s life provides a stimulus that is needed to bring excitement and happiness to a marriage that had reached a boring patch. It is however important to note that the ‘cheating moment’ magic only works in the hands of ‘good men’; men who know that the wife always comes first and who make it clear to the small house that she will always be second best. Take a deep breath and read again; the theory is not as crazy as you think.

Pregnancy and You - Where is the Man?

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I was ohhing and ahhing over a picture of Titi Oyinsan on the cover of Pregnancy and You Magazine and was doubly impressed when I realized in the full article that it was a photo shoot with her husband, fellow radio presenter, Gbemileke Oyinsan. They've had their twins now [see pictures], so the pictures are probably a few months old.

The magazine photo shoot and cover article reminded me of a discussion over on Ginger's blog on whether pregnancy was an excuse for men cheating on their wives. Of course it's not, but it was noted how sometimes women make it easier for such men by excluding them from the whole process of pregnancy, birth and parenting. I used the example of baby showers, which in my experience is female exclusive. For that reason, I really appreciated this magazine for giving Gbemi the opportunity to shine as well, even if they didn't put him on the cover.

See more pictures below...

Movie Review - Place Beyond the Pines

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The Place Beyond the Pines is a mid-range indie movie in the sense that it had some good actors though limited cinema release. The movie was essentially three movies in one; the first part was about Luke (played by Ryan Gosling), a stunt performer at a travelling circus who finds that he has fathered a son. This discovery radically alters his life's trajectory, turning him from vagrant to criminal, and it ultimately sets him up for a dramatic encounter with Avery, a young police officer who tries to capture him when he tries to evade arrest after a robbery gone horribly wrong.

The second part of the movie centers around Avery, and how he deals with the fallout of the encounter with Luke, while the last part fast-forwards to fifteen years after the second part, and the focus this time is on the children of Luke and Avery, who start up an unbalanced friendship, not knowing anything about the history between their fathers.

Atala's Review - I had heard quite a few good things about this movie before it came out, so I was quite looking forward to watching. However, I wasn't sure whether it would be shown in the cinemas in our area, because it was billed as kind of 'indie', and we don't usually get those shown. But the Movie God must have been smiling on me, because it just so happened that it was showing at our local cinema.

I found the first part of the movie the most touching and engaging. Sure, Luke goes off the rails and embarks on a life of crime (not that there was far to go, since he already lived life on the margins). But at his heart, he is driven to do this by a desire to become more of a father to the son he didn't know he had; it's as though seeing his son has made him realise how important it is to be a father.

Date Night at the Africa Movie Academy Awards AMAA

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Uche and Habiba Ogbu

The Africa Movie Academy Awards (AMAA) took place at the Glory Hall Cultural Centre, Yenagoa, Bayelsa last weekend, and as usual some people decided to step out on the red carpet with their significant others, friends or colleagues.

Read Charles Novia's review of the event here.