Thursday, April 25, 2013

No Condoms, No Sex

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One of the decisions any one who is sexually active has to make is what to use for protection against STIs and pregnancy. Condom is usually the simplest choice, though sometimes a few people allow either embarassment or shame prevent them from stocking up. The women think it's for the men to sort out, after all, they want sex more and will be the ones to use the condom. The men leave it for the women to take care of, after all they're the ones who'll get pregnant, right? At the end no one has a condom and it is time to do the do, what happens then?

Damiel Ademinokan has produced this wonderful short film titled No Jersey, No Match on this issue. One thing I appreciate is when a thematic movie uses very creative story telling to pass its message rather than have someone talking like they're on a pulpit. In that sense, this movie is one of the best didactic short films I've seen, perfectly scored, good acting, good writing, all the good stuff. Enjoy, and if you're sexually active, always have your condoms on stand-by :)

Throw Back Thurday - Bringing the Sexy

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This was about 5 years ago. I was already living in the UK and traveled to Nigeria for vacation. Like someone said in the last tbt post, my youngest sister who had just entered university then said, Myne, you're always very serious and formal. I know you're older than me, bla...bla...bla... but come let me show you how to let your hair down."

I already had the dress, which I often wore as a top to tights or jeans, the shoes, accessory and the hair. But she provided the makeup and put it all together. At the photographer's studio, she provided moral support as the guy reeled out model instructions - "head to the side, strut it, flaunt it, head up, hands bent, etc."

I love you sis, and I can honestly say, this was the picture that got Atala across seven oceans and seas to come get me. #trueword. Since then, I know it's quite important to sometimes not be so grown up and serious. You can also either be young and carefree, or you can bring the sexy!

Confused Girl… Are You Ready For Marriage?

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This is a response to Confused Girl's mail to Myne.

Are you ready for marriage?

Okay, brace yourself… NOPE! You not ready!!! Oh by the way, there is nothing wrong with that, marriage is an enormous step to take in life, so make sure you don’t feel bad at all!  And it appears it is a combined case of the normal pre-marriage hesitations, as well as you having two additional complications, your bisexuality AND his plans to move back to Nigeria so soon.

Some sweet but tough love.

Okay now you know when people typically say: He is my perfect companion, or She is my soul mate  or we were made for each other…Not true at all. Are you old enough to know the Whispers classic song: And the beat goes on? As the Chorus goes: “…just like fishes in the ocean, they'll  always be someone new…”

So if the relationship ends, eventually, you BOTH will and should certainly be able to move on to equally happy, rewarding and fulfilling relationships with somebody else. Why? Well I do not believe in the concept of a perfect match, meaning only ONE person out there that was meant for you. I do however believe in the perfect TYPE of person or group of people out there that would be the most ideal for you. Hence if you miss one person who appears to be the ideal match, there is most certainly another out there within your ideal group that will meet and possibly even beat what you feel is only available to you in your current fiancé. I have personally experienced this. And I am willing to bet there are others out there who did not marry that “ideal” one person, but today are in a great marriage with somebody else.

15 Simple Romance Tips for Busy Couples

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By Seyi Obasi

Has your spouse complained recently that you haven’t been spending enough time together? Have they complained that you aren't as romantic and attentive as you used to be? Or have you felt some distance slowly building up between you two?

I completely understand. I have a full time job and my husband is a banker, so you can imagine how difficult it must be for us to spend time together. And it’s easy to become a bit complacent after a while and just get too busy for romance.

Personally, I used to spend time shopping for love cards for my husband, planning weekend getaways and dates nights back in the early days of our marriage. My husband was equally romantic and reciprocated with his own brand of romantic gestures. I really enjoyed being on the receiving end of all that romance and attention.

But that was a long time ago. After ten years of marriage, conflicting schedules and our many roles in life (especially as parents to three bubbly children), we have been experiencing some "dry patches" in our marriage lately. Lack of communication, not spending quality time together, busyness and fatigue have lulled us into a state of I-have-no-time-for-romance.

In a recent counseling session, I and my husband were told to do everything we could to break through our excuses and bring the romance back using a unique approach: Simple Romance.

The Wife Diaries - Episode Three

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I shrieked, pulled the trench coat tightly over my breasts and took the stairs up, two or three at a time. I flung open our bedroom door and ran straight to the bed to hide under the sheets until the humming in my ears ceased. I was so embarrassed!

As I lay under the covers basking in my utter humiliation, feeling sorry for myself and wondering what my husband was thinking, I heard the door crack open slowly.

“Babe..?” My husband said quietly from the door. “You okay?”

I shook my head and brought it up to look at him. He was standing just inside the door, a worried expression with a slight hint of amusement sat on his face. He peered at me curiously and his lips shook as he tried to bite back a laugh.

I sank back under the covers and cringed.

I felt the bed sink low as he came to sit next to me and rub my side through the covers.

“So um…care to explain what just happened down there?”

“No…” I whined.

“well, Felix thinks you’re hot…”

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie's Americanah in Nigeria

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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie's Americanah will be released in Lagos on April 27 at Terra Kulture, VI. The book itself is already on sale in major Nigerian bookstores. The poster shows the book tour schedule. I know some of you guys in Lagos will be all over this.

Date Night Movie Review - Tyler Perry's Temptation

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Tyler Perry's Temptation follows the life of a newly married couple, Judith and Brice. Judith works at a matchmaking firm; Brice is a pharmacist. Things are just about OK with them, but one day Judith has to work with Harley, a very rich entrepreneur. Harley makes it clear that he is very interested in her, and she begins to wonder whether she's really getting all she wants from her relationship with Brice.

Myne's Review - I know this review is coming so late, but it's been very busy around these parts. I gave a quasi review in this post earlier about a particular sex scene in the movie. I wasn't a big fan of the movie, I have to confess, and preferred Good Deeds over it. But Temptation had its good sides. Kim Kardashian played a version of herself named Ava, and she was actually pretty good.

Vanessa Williams lit the room whenever she appeared on screen, and she had a funny French accent though she lost it quickly enough when circumstances called for it. The other actors were just OK, but they were all very good looking people, Lance Gross almost set the screen on fire in one of his bathroom scenes, black is beautiful o :)

Atala's review - When I saw the trailer for "Tyler Perry's Temptation", I was quite eager to watch the movie, because the theme of personal conflict appealed very much to me. Also, I quite liked Tyler Perry's "Good Deeds", so I thought I would enjoy this too.