Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Dear Myne - I Really Didn't Realise How Much I Loved Him Till I Broke up With Him

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Dear Myne, My name is Alicia and I'm in my early twenties (Of course, it is not my real name). There is this friend of mine that I have been in a relationship with. He is the best guy I've ever met. Through being friends, we became more than friends. He didn't exactly ask me out, but our friendship culminated into a relationship.

Then, my parents found out about him. They were like I don't want to be useful to them and wipe away their tears. They said he was too young and not yet a man. That he would use me and dump me. They disapproved of him for me but I didn't care. I stood my ground. Afterall, we weren't doing anything wrong and our relationship was platonic. He wouldn't dare go that way and moreover, marriage was the last thing on my mind. But things got crazy so I asked him to stay away for sometime.

Three months passed and we didn't communicate nor see each other because my parents were monitoring my footsteps, calls, texts and everything. My movement was restricted. I was even beaten up. It was a horrible time for me. Recently a lot happened. My family was in a deep mess and so was I.

First, my parents are not together anymore and I don't know if they'll get back together. Then, there's the financial problems. My both parents are owing people heavily and can even be sued right now. To top it all, I don't have a job today. I resigned from my last job cos my boss was making advances at me, had similar problems with other places I worked. At least if I had a job, I would be able too help but I don't. I don't even know where my tuition fee will come from if I eventually get admission this year.

So, I was confused and I thought ending my relationship with him will actually help me clear my mind afterall what we had wasn't really a relationship since we couldn't see or talk to each other. So, the next time we chatted, I ended my relationship with him.

Immediately I made that decision I regretted it. Ever since that night I've not been able to sleep. I keep thinking about him... I just can't get him of my mind. I've not been able to face my so called problems. I guess, I really didn't realise how much I loved him till I broke up with him.

I've been trying to reach him all to no avail. He is avoiding me. I know I hurt him but what he doesn't know is that I'm hurting too. The thing is I don't even know how to face him if he eventually agrees to meet me. I really need your help. I don't know what to do.


  1. I don't know. You tell him to stay away for a while (3 months), and the first contact you have after is to tell him you're breaking up. I'd ignore your calls too.

  2. My dear lady, I think you have enough problems of your own, why not face them for now? You're also young and have all your life ahead of you.

    1. You've said it all, thank you. She hasn't even finished school even. I bet she will forget him in no time if she moves her mind away to other things, like her family, job and school palava.

  3. Just walking past.

  4. Girl you are too young to be crying over a man...get over it! You have a lot on your plate to worry about a man. Get yourself situated first, strive to be don't have a job, instead of you to focus on securing one, you are getting depressed over a man. If the so called man was such a good best friend, why did he not know what you were going through?

    Let me be blunt with you, men don't like liability, and right now, you appear to be one. I want to see you do better for yourself, and trust me everything will fall into place. Mark my words, 5 years from now, whenever you remember this, you will laugh and ask yourself...what was I thinking!!!


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