Friday, May 31, 2013

A TTC Husband Writes a Letter to His Unborn Child

Posted in: , , ,

When I read this letter, tears almost came to my own years. As a woman who lives with unexplained infertility, I can totally get where this man is coming from. While we have certainly come a longer road than the couple in the letter - 4 years married to their 1+ but the experience and feelings are mostly the same no matter at what stage you are. And I know indeed that men also cry. I pray the couple gets their heart's wishes in a good time for them.

Read his letter below...

My child,

Its just over 31 months since that day I took the stroll down the aisle with your mummy and said our vows before God and man. Since that day, we have been waiting expectantly for you. Sometimes we wonder what is taking you so long. Sometimes we imagine its taking so long because you must be very special. Most times our hearts have remained undoubtedly sure that your coming is very close, and in fact closer than we think. But then, you do not need to keep us waiting anymore.

But don’t think we have not done our fair share of things that are believed will make you come quickly. I have been severally tested and found to be perfect, having millions of you inside me. Mummy has been severally tested too and everything is in place, no cysts, no fibroids. And we have sown seeds too, financially and otherwise. We have invested in other children and continue to do so. We have followed plethora of advice on what and what not to do. We have not allowed our expectations to metamorphose into anxiety… yet you are yet to come.

And you know what? Mummy needs you! There is just something about African culture and the African woman that has made having you a certificate of completeness. You are the very person she needs right now. She has God, she has me, but she needs you to balance the equation. She has heard how discomfiting pregnancy can be... and how much more painful labour is too. But I can tell you that she is ready to go through all of that and more just to have you. Mummy G that has a 3yr-old and a 2yr-old just gave birth another 2 months ago. Mummy T that has a 2yr+ old is already carrying another. These people live in the same compound with mummy. Infact, your uncle and aunty that married after your mummy and daddy already hold their children in their hands. Granddaddy and Grandmummy are not putting mummy under pressure. They call her from time to time to encourage her to be patient. My siblings and hers do the same too. But little by little, mummy is beginning to put herself under pressure. I am doing everything I can to help her, but I need you to help me.

And don’t think that I don’t want you too! I want you with the last drop of my blood. I love you so much my heart literally aches sometimes. Children’s day was celebrated yesterday in church and it was beautiful. My eyes were flooded with tears to see so many lovely children showcasing their talents. I know that if you were here, you would have been one of the best! Anyway, I bought some gifts for children that are needy on your behalf; so know that your name is already recorded in church!

Today is Children's Day. If you were here, I would have taken the day off work to have fun with you at Inspiration FM’s Children Day’s Carnival at Dreamworld Africana. We would have had many lovely rides and yummy ice cream together, and I would have been overwhelmed just to hear you laugh. Nothing can describe how I would feel just to hold you in my arms knowing that you are my seed become flesh.

Please do not heed all the bad news on the airwaves and think the world is bad place. Do not listen to statistics that show that Nigeria is uninhabitable. We have sworn to do all we can to make the world a beautiful place for you. You will meet many challenges, but most importantly, you would have been prepared to overcome them.

I have to stop now because am in the office and my eyes are teary again. My boss just asked what’s wrong my eyes (lol) so I have to run before they find I have been crying. But am not ashamed to cry if it will make you come quickly. I know that we will surmount any mountain to finally have you in our arms… it’s just that waiting can be so hard sometimes.

We love you as no other human can ever and will ever do.

From the best Dad you could ever have,


Source - Nairaland


  1. Wow! Very heart wrenching Myne, I waited "only" eleven months and it is no way a good place to be. I pray God and this baby reads this letter and hastens to soothe this longing in this couples heart.
    Thanks for sharing!

  2. This letter brought taers to my eyes I don't know why.

  3. i want 2 cry,,bt i cant i hv 2 hold broda GOD IS ON UR SIDE HE WIL SURLY BLES UR UNION WIT CHILDREN OF D 2 SEX IN JESUS NAME AMEEEEN..

  4. It hurts to be in this position, some of us just take things for granted. I pray your prayers are answered speedily.

  5. My cousin have been married since Nov. 2001, and they are still believing God for a child. I say a prayer for them always, and I know that something great is about to happen soon. Myne, pls do not give up, God is faithfully. My family friend who has been married since May 2001, just had a baby in Dec. 2012. I was so over joyed! I have another friend who was married for 16yrs, her baby shower is in July next month and we can not wait. I know you too will give your testimony. Cheers and best wishes!!!

  6. A very touching letter. God has read it and He is doing something already,so watch out.

  7. A very emotional letter, his pain and longing like an open wound.. May they get their heart's desire, God bless

  8. This made me cry. This too will pass.

  9. This reminds me of my hair dresser, she has been married for 7yrs now and she is still expecting...I see that sadness in her eyes whenever she tell me madam flow is around for the month...this is so touching and sad...

  10. I was thinking this was one of those made up poetic letters once again, till I read how he wished to spend Children's day. His heart is so full of love. Heavenly Father, please grant these loving hearts their desire, in Jesus name.

  11. Heart-wrenching ! This brought so much tears to my eyes. I was barely married for 3 months when my in-laws started making snide retorts. Luckily for me, I conceived into my 5th month & baby is due in August. Irrespective of their faith, Ya Allah pls bless this couple with multiple fruits of the womb. Aamin. He would make such a fantastic dad! God bless!

  12. I am teary eyed reading this......he just put into words every emotion TTC couples go through. It is well. As sure as the break of dawn, God will bring to bless our homes with children in Jesus name..amen..

  13. Officially waiting for fours, I pray our babies will come soon.

  14. This is a very moving letter, tears rolling down my cheeks as I write and whole heartedly hope the couple is blessed with their heart desires in good time.

    And to all that are in the same position, may you be blessed with the fruits of the womb.

    Now, while I don't have the full picture of the couple's life other than the fact that their wishes for children have not come to pass, I really hope that they and others in similar situation have gone through proper tests in order to know where to focus their energies.

    Infertility problem is a global issue and the cause of individual inability to conceive differs greatly from the others. Knowing the source of the issue, be it from the man or the woman will help to better face the challenge head on and could help the couple to make informed decision.



Click Post a Comment to share your thoughts, I'll love to hear from you. Thanks!

*Comments on old posts are moderated and may take sometime to be shown. That's just because I want to see them and respond to you if necessary.