Friday, May 31, 2013

A TTC Husband Writes a Letter to His Unborn Child

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When I read this letter, tears almost came to my own years. As a woman who lives with unexplained infertility, I can totally get where this man is coming from. While we have certainly come a longer road than the couple in the letter - 4 years married to their 1+ but the experience and feelings are mostly the same no matter at what stage you are. And I know indeed that men also cry. I pray the couple gets their heart's wishes in a good time for them.

Should Men Carry Their Girlfriend's or Wife's Handbag?

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In the picture of Zoe Saldana with her new boyfriend [see here] he is carrying her handbag and that got me thinking. One often hears stories of men who say they would rather die than carry their wife's or girlfriend's handbag. Then there are those who don't really mind or wouldn't but fear being teased or thought to be less of a man if they did that.

A friend spoke of how after her husband helped her carry her handbag - she was carrying their baby and had to answer a phone call so handed hubby her coach tote - her own father who had also been there warned them seriously. She had to respectfully disagree with her dad, and her hubby spoke up too. The father was worried about gender roles, appearances of respect and what people would say. The couple on their part tried to emphasize that what mattered was their relationship and whether they understood each other. He was just helping.

Now, I don't want to make it seem like carrying a woman's handbag is like the ultimate of all symbols of love. The gesture, on its own, is not a definition or confirmation of love, but can be a way to show you care for your partner, PDA if you will.

The funny thing for me, or maybe not so funny, is the way some men look at female handbags like there was a contaminable disease they could get by carrying one.

No Sex in Your Marriage? It May Be More Common Than You Know

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According to a recent report, it seems that it is very common for wives and mothers to ‘shut up shop’ and stop having sex with their partners if their family is complete, or for the men to do the same for lack of libido. Another reason for lack of sex could be a health problem that affect the sex drive or organs, like a hysteroctomy in women, or prostrate cancer surgery in men. For the first reason for no sex, I guess if the primary reason the couple got married was for children, then it makes sense?

The report goes on to detail the marriage of three couples who have not had sex for varying amounts of time, between a year and eight years. If you ask me, I'll say the first two marriages are in trouble if the partner who lacks the desire or motivation for sex does not get some rest or therapy and work with their partners to rekindle their sex lives. The last couple are in their sixties and the woman it seems has already come to terms with a sexless marriage - more like a companionship arrangement.

Kim Kardashian in Fun and Flirty Maternity Dress

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When she's not attending one fashionable event or the other, Kim Kardashian, like all of us, has her days off too where she just takes time to chill, hang out with friends, do some shopping, etc. And with her due date just round the corner, easy and comfortable seems to be the determinant of what Kim Kardashian now wears at those times. This short dress is so simple and cute, makes her look like a teenager, and I love the sandals.

Couple Love - Zoe Saldana and Marco Perego

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Zoe Saldana ended a 12-year relationship with an engagement to entrepreneur Keith Britton in 2011, which left her heartbroken. She rebounded in a short-lived affair with Bradley Cooper. Now she's with Italian artist Marco Perego. With all the PDA recently, I wish them the best.

Magazine Covers - Omawumi on Motherhood Instyle

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I like this cover of Omawumi on Motherhood Instyle.  I salute Omawumi for keeping her head up, I know a lot of people can't get over the fact that she's a single and unmarried mother, and for the brands that continue to keep her front and center on their covers and campaigns.

Thursday, May 30, 2013

Pictures From JMartins and Nnezi's Wedding Ceremony

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J Martins - real names Martins Okey Justice - solemnized his marriage to fiance, Nnezi Diane, yesterday in Lagos. The couple had their traditional wedding back in January of last year. See pictures from both ceremonies below. I found her outfit choices for the wedding after party quite non-traditional, a sequinned mini, and a black gown. Very adventurous, but looked great on her. Happy married life to them.

Throwback Thursday - A More Rounded Me

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I almost forgot but thank to the person who reminded me. I read somewhere that you don't say chubby or fat any more, it's round and rounder now. So this was my roundest back in my twenties.

How Weight Loss May Affect Your Relationship

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I first noticed the effect intentional weight loss could have on couples in one episode of the Extreme Makeover - Weight Loss Edition, one of my favorite summer TV shows. Some of the people featured are married or in relationships and in most cases, their partners are very supportive, often times, joining them while at home and losing some weight themselves.

Not A Groupie - A Sweet Short Story

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I was just standing there on the side lines waiting for the actual doors to open up for this so called concert Bisola dragged me to. I was never into Nigerian music too much, just the occasional popular ones that I’d randomly see tweets about. Every now and then, I get curious enough to google the current slangs and it almost always ends up being from a Nigerian song.

Watch 30 Days with Genevieve Nnaji Online

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This movie was made in 2006 and I first saw the previews in 2007 and wanted to see it. It was finally released earlier this year. I hear the Film Censors Board in Nigeria are not very happy with the story and how it seems the movie makers were promoting terrorism or revolution in the movie. Well, thank God for the internet because they can now put the video online and anyone can see. I intend seeing it over this weekend, and you can watch it right here for $4.99. I think it's worth it.

Couple Love - Joseph Yobo and Adaeze Igwe

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Adaeze Igwe was the Most Beautiful Girl in Nigeria for 2008 and met Joseph Yobo, captain of the National football team, a year later. The got married the same year and had their baby the next. Married for over three years now, they are still going strong. Wishing them more years of love and happiness.

Date Night Movie Review - 42

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42 is about how Jackie Robinson gets to play for the New York Dodgers, thus becoming the first African-American to play in Major League Baseball in sixty years. But as they say, it's often more about the "how" than the "what", and so it proved to be in this case. The film showed the opposition faced by Robinson by baseball players, coaches and fans as he moved from playing from the minor to major leagues.

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Dear Myne - How Do I Handle Unfriendly Sisters-in-Law to be?

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DEAR MYNE, I'm in my late twenties, in a serious relationship but need people's advise on how to handle some issues in my relationship.  Firstly, his younger sisters - my fiancé is the only boy in a family of 5. His sisters were receptive when i first met them, but after like some months of meeting them, they changed and I don't know the reasons for that.

Holy Ghost Fire Burn The Calories! Nigerian Woman Prays Over Her Food

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You just have to listen to this woman's prayer as she blasts all the cholesterol and calories in her mountain of oatmeal and vegetable soup. It must be a joke, I can't believe anyone prays like this, or do they? LOL...

POLL - Open or Closed Bathroom Door For Couples?

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The times Atala came to visit me while we were still dating, he stayed with me. That was when I first considered the issue of open or closed bathroom doors. The doors remained closed that time, and for the first few weeks of our marriage. And then slowly, they began to open. The slide to open doors began as we had more and more showers together and it has been shifting to other activities too.

Where are the Women in Engineering, IT and Tech?

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By Atala,

More and more these days, the boundaries are being broken down with respect to what professions men and women want to do. Time was when there were very specific career options open to women, such as teaching and nursing; this is not really surprising, considering that it was only until the late nineteenth century that many universities began to start opening their doors to women. These days, things are much different, so that according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics ( over a third of doctors, about a third of lawyers and around three-fifths of accountants in America are women.

7 Secrets To Having The Perfect Wedding Day

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By Fikayo Giwa,

There’s no such thing as a perfect wedding day! Controversial or perhaps drastic statement I know but what I mean is that not everything will go as planned. Once you come to terms with this fact; you will feel a lot more peace in the final planning stages and on the day.

The Wife Diaries - Episode Six

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I watched Nkem in agony, day in, day out. The cloud of shame that hung over her head was so thick it was hard to miss anytime she stepped into a room. She started coming to church with us on sundays though and really started to get involved. Of course I know that just because a person was physically stepping into church every sunday, that didn’t make them born again over night but I was encouraged because she had taken a step at least.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Dear Myne - He is a Widow and a lot Older Than Me

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I totally love your blog i learn i a lot of things from almost all your post and your readers comments that's why i think i can seek advice from you. This is my story. I am a 25 year old girl just trying to make herself happy. I have not been in a relationship for almost a year now as i just wanted to be on my own, i have gone on a few dates, and have a couple of toasters around but there is one man who has kinda caught my heart.

Woman Delivers Baby on Sidewalk in Front of Hospital

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Most babies either come quickly or take their time. However, most wait till mother is where she needs to be to have the baby, on a bed, bath, and with her birthing attendants. Some babies however don't hang about, it's time when it's time and they're coming whether you're ready or not. A Florida birth photographer shares her experience of one of such 'fast' babies.

Warning - Graphic pictures.

Real Love Story - A Romantic Liaison Mediated By Her Uncle

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Chinwe: One day in May 2010, an uncle - my maternal aunt’s husband - called to say he had a surprise for me. Expectedly I was excited although I didn’t have a clue what the surprise could be. He then said something like, “There’s a handsome, nice, God-fearing etc etc young man here that I think you’d love to meet. He’ll make a great husband.” What??? I couldn’t believe he said that! He didn’t even ask if I was in a relationship or something. I believe in meeting guys myself (especially Mr Right!) and I totally detest third party-mediated romantic liaisons.

Magazine Covers - Azeezat on House of Maliq

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It was a double cover, with Yvonne Nelson on one side, and Azeezat on the other. I prefer Azeezat's, she has such a unique face, and I'm loving the hair too.

Date Ideas - The Incorruptible Judge - A Play

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Who remembers this stage play? One of the funniest plays I've ever read and at the same time it had a very upstanding message against corruption one that has stayed with me all this while. The play is being staged at Terra Kulture today and tomorrow.

More Eye Candy From the Mr Universe Contest

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There were only a few pictures available when I made this initial post, now the complete list of the contestestants in the Mr. Universe Nigeria event has been released. Some are good, some are bad, some are hilarious. Enjoy my favorites here...

Monday, May 27, 2013

Jayso & Sarkodie feat. Efya - I'm In Love With Your Girlfriend

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This music video is subtitled, The Movie, and it shows. It has a story complete with a twist. I loved the concept though there were a few loose ends in the story telling. The song however is quite well done.

Photos - Patience Ozokwor Attends Son's Wedding in London

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Actress Patience Ozokwor was an epitome of the proud and happy mama as her first son, Uchendu Ozokwor, had his wedding ceremony, both white and traditional in London last Saturday. He got married to his longtime girlfriend Gloria Nweze, and the event was attended by friends, family and well wishers.

Not our Property - Will Smith on Fatherhood

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In this interview promoting After Earth, another film they both star in,Will Smith expands of what he sees in the future for his son, Jaden Smith, teaching him how to hunt, as opposed to simply giving him fish, and hoping to build a dynasty. I think he's being a great example of a father that a lot of African American sons need in their lives. I hope the children are just as successful as the father, I'm a big fan.

Dear Myne - Should I Date his Friend?

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Hey Myne, So I usually agree with majority of the comments that your readers leave with relationship advice. So I thought maybe they could help me with recent matter I am dealing with.

So I have been talking to this guy called “B” for little over a year.  In B’s past relationships it appears as if women have always pressed him about getting married. Thus earlier in our dating history B would always drop sly remarks about not being ready for marriage.  Oddly enough, I do not remember ever bringing up the topic of marriage. Nevertheless, I am of age so I guess he could sense that sooner or later we would have to cross that bridge.

On Melvin Oduah Repping Nigeria in Big Brother Africa 2013

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How many people are watching the Big Brother Africa which started yesterday? I am.

Surprised? LOL... don't be. Not only am I visiting a cousin who is a huge fan of the franchise, it turns out that one of the people representing Nigeria is my homeboy, from the same village as I am in Asaba. My cousin knows him personally as they've been family friends for years, and I've met him a couple of times, first time being when he was still a pimply teenager. Now he's a fine boy no pimples :)

So if you're watching and voting, please help to keep Melvin in the game till the very end. He is a very cool and down to earth person as his bio below on the BBA website shows. And I promise to bring my own portion of that $300,000 prize money and share it here, lol...

Cannes Red Carpet Dresses That Look Like Wedding Gowns

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Liya Kebede

The Cannes 2013 Film Festival officially roundd off yesterday, and through it all some gorgeous gowns have graced the red carpet. Quite a number of them reminded me of wedding gowns, Nicole Kidman wore a couple of them, but I liked this one by Liya Kebede the most. Enjoy, and tell me which is your favorite in the comments...

Looking For a Life Partner is Not as Simple as Shopping!

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This response came in to Timi Robins suggestion on this post for singles looking for partners to apply the same sense as they do for shopping. The discussion in the comments on the post have been interesting, but what I understand that to mean is that rather than just praying then folding their hands and hiding out in their houses, singles should go out there to see and be seen, and then use a guideline of what they want to find, or be found. Like this commenter below explains, sometimes life is very complex, and shopping is not as simple as we may think.

Pregnant Kim Kardashian Pops in Red Gown

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Following the little black dress here, I decided to keep an eye out for Kim Kardashian dressing her bump in ways I liked. I think this maxi gown on Kim Kardashian looks amazing, love the color and how it shows off her curves without being too tight. The material looks comfortable too.

Sunday, May 26, 2013

Relationship Game - Who Would You?

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We have here some of the guys who were featured in the February man candy, men who look good and work hard. These three are in the movie industry - Kalu Ikeagwu, Chris Attoh and Gbenro Ajibade. So this is a meme with questions. Let's have fun. Of these three men,

Most People Will Remain Friends With Their Ex

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Our last poll indicates that majority of people will remain on friendly terms and in contact with their exes. This was the resounding result according to a sample of 130 people who responded to the question, would you remain friends with an ex? Split almost evenly, more than 70% said they would either be friends or acquaintances with their ex. About 25% were not as chill and easy about ended relationships. 4 voters were not joking at all, to them, an ex is automatically an enemy. See the breakdown below.

You Cannot Change People

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Dtone Martins - Kati Kati (Music Meets Romance)

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Dtone Martins is a young singer and musician who describes his music as afrique-soul. This song, one of several of his that I really liked is laced with a traditional folk sound, and the corny lyrics are cute for when you just want some easy listening music to relax to.

Saturday, May 25, 2013

For Men - How To Bring the Sexy Into Your Marriage

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This post was written in response to the guy whose wife is shy and reserved in the bedroom [see post], and a more specific version was sent back to him in reply. He enjoyed the comments on the previous post and wishes, like some others who commented on the post, that RML had more general posts on the issue of happy sex in marriage.

Would you date a guy who does not speak ‘good’ English?

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Most women dream of one day meeting a man they can fall in love with and who will love them back. In the dream, they end up married, he is the father of her children, and they spend the rest of their lives together.
In these dreams, the man is usually handsome with a good physique, well dressed, rich, educated, romantic and well mannered. But does this man also have to speak impeccable English?

A Typical Nigerian Woman on Divorce - Never!

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The question is when should a woman divorce her husband? According to most of the respondents, both married and unmarried, in the video, the possibility of divorce is a big fat never! Was anyone really surprised? But I don't want to overlook about 2 or 3 of the women who accepted divorce as an option to move on from an unhealthy marriage where they've found themselves victims of abusive or philandering husbands.

Date Idea - Taruwa Festival of Performing Arts

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This June, in addition to its monthly gatherings, Taruwa introduces a festival, Taruwa Festival of Performing Arts in Nigeria designed as a 3day cocktail of rich events. TAF is an annual event kicking off this year on Thursday June 6 and ending on Saturday, June 8, 2013, to paint Lagos all shades of art through music, poetry, theatre, dance, fashion and screening of short films, all holding at TerraKulture, Victoria Island, Lagos

Friday, May 24, 2013

Magazine Covers - Joselyn Dumas on New African Woman

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Joselyn Dumas, Ghanain actress and TV Host covers one of the three issues (UK version) of the upcoming June/July edition of The New African Woman. She's looking fierce!

Dear Myne - I Find it Difficult Making Emotional Attachments

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I am an avid reader of your blog and find responses by readers quite insightful, maybe they can help with my dilemmas. Its in plural because they are more than one.

First is, I find it difficult to continue be emotionally engaged with people. I am not talking of sentimental love, but emotional engagement. Maybe I should clarify, people regard me as loving, nice and warm and they want to come near, but after awhile I feel drained. Even in a relationship, I get tired easily and just want to be alone. I have had 2 serious relationships and I can say they ended due to self-sabotage.

Couple Love - Jim Iyke and Nadia Buari declare Love on Twitter

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Jim Iyke and Nadia Buari tweeted about their relationship status, with Jim saying, "Love is a f***king beautiful thang!" Nadia was more sedate and philosophical, "There comes a point in ur life wen u realise who really matters, who never did and who always will."

I wish they remain BFF forever.

Creative Ways To Thank Your Bridal Party

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By Fikayo Giwa,

One of the things that make a wedding day the most fun for a young couple is their friends and bridal party. It is so important to have really good friends on your train; people you can really have fun with, as this will make all the difference once the DJ starts playing. Besides that, they will be on hand for you all day making sure you are happy, comfortable and well taken care of.

What Not to Do On A First Date

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When singles decide to go out on a first date together after being introduced, or meeting online, they usually have a lot of questions. Not just for each other, but about what might be expected of them. How should they dress, should they offer to split the bill, for the ladies, or should they ask the lady to split, for the guys. Also are issues about what to talk about, be fashionably late, etc. And then there's the elephant in the room, go for sex on the first date or not?

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Throwback Thursday - President Obama's Prom Pictures

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When we take pictures, we never imagine where they could end up, or where WE would end up. In 1979 I can almost swear that Barack Obama did not know he would be president one day. Well, he is, and the first black president of the United States also. So for #tbt today, I present for your viewing pleasure, the prom pictures the president took with his friends back at the end of their high school. He also writes on the year book of one of them, calling her "foxy", lol. How times change :)

Magazine Covers I'm Liking - Cossy Orjiakor on Chizy's Spyware

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I went to secondary school with Cossy Orjiakor, and I remember when we had our school group on Facebook and there was a long thread about her career choice with people taking sides and all. Well, let's just say that like maybe some other people in the public eye, she is much more than most people assume.

20 Topics To Discuss In Preparing For Marriage

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By Melissa Diem,

Getting married is a big deal, that is why it is important to follow this list of things to discuss before marriage. Covering these topics will ensure that you and your future husband have an understanding of what each of you want for the future. This list covers everything from children to money to who’s doing the dishes Friday night.

9 Steps To Empowering Yourself As A Woman

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For most of us women, we have to struggle to discover ourselves and who we are in our personal circles and in society as a whole. Some books want us to act like ladies while thinking like men, others want us to be B*tches in order to get ahead. But at the end of the day, we are women and we just want to be ourselves. No shoes are as comfortable as the ones we choose for ourselves.

There may be a Nigerian Connection in the Woolwich Attack

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I was shocked when I checked my feeds yesterday and saw this news of a couple of men attacking a lone soldier on the streets of London and hacking him to death with knives and meat cleavers. It was just so horrifying that I kind of tuned out. There has just been so much bad news in the past few weeks, both far and nearer to home.

Kate Middleton in Yellow at the Buckingham Palace Garden Party

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The Buckingham Palace garden party is where the Queen hosts tea for 8,000 members of the public in the gardens of her London residence. The pregnant duchess looker very summery in yellow as she counts down the weeks to her due date. Kate Middleton was also photographed with her father-in-law, Prince Charles and Camilla. It would have been nice to see her with William, but... they say work calls.

See more pictures below...

Couple Love - Ashton Kutchner and Mila Kunis

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Ashton Kutchner and Mila Kunis have been dating now for over a year and reports say they've met her parents. They do look good together but I have to confess that my fingers are still crossed. Good luck to them.