Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Nigerian Power Couples - The Secrets to their Long-lasting Marriages

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What has really kept them together this long? Does having lasting relationships have anything to do with working together? These couples are in the spotlight and contrary to the notion that celebrity marriages don’t last, these ones have been able to weather the storm. Probably there could be some peculiar observations that we can make.

Married for 10years+

Fela and Tara Durotoye: Fela is a motivational speaker and business coach and Tara is an Entrepreneur. Need we say more about how they help and complement each other? This is what Fela Said to Tara on their fourth wedding anniversary :

“I am committed to working with God to bring out the best you that God has put in you. I am determined on seeing all of God’s dreams for you come to pass. Today, it’s House of Tara, in a short while, the WORLD OF TARA would soon become a reality, the multi-national empire that reveals the real beauty in every woman from the four corners of the world.”

Tunde and Wunmi Obe (T.W.O): Tunde and Wunmi have been singing together right from university days. They’ve always been working together in whateverventure they get into. In his words Tunde tells what has kept them together:

“First and foremost, it is God. Without Him, we couldn’t have lasted this long and secondly, there is this mutual respect. And from the beginning she saw me as someone who had something to offer. And its vice versa. She matches up with me intellectually and socially. You should marry someone that can measure up to your intelligence. We also communicate a lot, and the respect between us makes it easier. I see her as my equal, I don’t talk to her in a condescending manner, neither do I use derogatory words for her. There is also the love factor, but we also made up our minds that we were going to ensure it works”.

Married for 25years+

Olu and Joke Jacobs: Olu Jacobs and Joke Silva grew in acting together, they just keyed into each other, and look at each other like partners not rivals. This is what Olu has to say:

“ It is always good when God gives you your friend as spouse, when you meet your friend as your wife, life would be much easier because when others fail, you would succeed with friendship. Joke is more than a friend to me, she is a mother, a friend and a very caring, generous and deep person”

Soni and Betty Irabor: Soni is a Broadcaster and Betty a journalist, author and publisher. They complement each other and make up for each other’s weaknesses. Hear what Betty has to say:

“The truth about marriage is that there isn’t one that is perfect. We are talking about strangers meeting, courting each other and deciding to spend the rest of their lives together. There could be things that could create a strain in the early years of the marriage, but marriage in itself is a relationship where you continue to learn…So we must continue to feed our marriages with love, appreciate the other person and know that neither the wife nor the husband is a magician. So don’t expect that your husband would know that right now you are not feeling happy. The only way he would know is by telling him, so stop over-expectation. People are full of expectations in marriage and that can create a lot of strain…Let your marriage be your marriage. As much as possible, lock out people who don’t need to be part of the marriage. Marriage is all about what you put into it.”


Challenges will always come in marriage, but it’s easier to manage relationships when both visions tally. You must have a meeting point, you may not necessary be in the same industry but you must be able to work together, complement each other, help each other. Your foundational beliefs and philosophies of life should be similar beyond just doing the same things.

Even if you are not in the same industry as your partner, there should be something you can do together. If you are already married, what were your meeting points or common interests or visions? Look for something you can do together now or in the future. Think of growing a business together, having an Ngo together, or it can even be a series of short term projects like; organizing events etc.

So if you are in a relationship leading to marriage, this is the right time to come up with the right analysis of your similarities and how you can augment each other’s shortcomings, so you can have a clear vision of what to expect in marriage. You can even take up little challenges while dating as a test to see if you are compatible. Don’t wait till when you are planning your wedding before you begin to get some rude shocks! But do it with an open mind, not witch-hunting, it will help you both to know yourselves better and I getting married is worth it. If you prepare well before marriage, you will eventually do well.


Republished from Naija Resource


  1. I really like what Tunde said about being on the same level intellectually and communicating.
    I was married before, I found that i did not respect him enough because we were not on the same level in so many things.
    I was very bored because he did not want to do anything until he was pushed

  2. Marriage- Takes God and compatibility to make it work

  3. I love this! Thanks for sharing!

  4. Tunde Obe did it for me...You just must be on the same level with your partner intellectually and yes, COMMUNICATION sure is the key.

  5. Very interesting...nice one Mayne

  6. Hmmm...Did someone say marriage?? LOL. Let me not start, you know how I get. Great Post and Joke Jacobs looks so good.

  7. I like what Betty Irabor said. I've always liked Mr & Mrs Jacobs...beautiful couple.

  8. Thanks for sharing these memos with us.
    Marriage is work and we have to face the reality of it.
    May God help us all.

  9. just got news today of a friend filing for divorce after 3 years cuz his wife cheated :(

    the devil is really attacking the family unit

    thanks for this reminder

    1. That is so sad. I hope they can sort it out amicably.

    2. Oops for that, he is supposed to forgive
      not revenge o
      It is like living kingdom
      It will hurt a lot to do what God says
      But it will be worth it!

  10. So i was randomly scrolling through a website when i came in contact with your webpage. I love the site first of all and your books are amazing. I am a die hard romantic and hope i can get this at a store close to me. I will definitely be adding you to my list of authors.

    1. Thank you, and I'm glad you dropped a comment too. :)

  11. Doing something together sure has a way of keeping a marriage. At the end of the day though, commitment is key

  12. Myne, this is one of the best articles I've ever read online. Much love to all the couples featured here and I pray for many years filled with love for them and for everyone aspiring to have these kinds of lasting relationships.

  13. Thanks for doing this- marriage is sure amazing when you are in it with your best friend

  14. Marriage is just understanding... Is there anything like COMPATIBILITY in marriage??? I think most marriages are broken up these days 'cos couples are too busy looking for compatibility than making their marriages work! It takes a lot of understanding 4 a marriage to succeed........................

  15. I love Tunde Obe's comment on connecting with his wife intellectually. That's often overlooked, but it is important. And Betty Irabor's comment on feeding your marriage makes sense. If you want something to grow, it's logical to feed it. Thanks for sharing this.

  16. Awww I look forward to having a loving and beautiful marriage.

  17. Have the same intelligence level
    (or you will pretend all your life) work together,
    ...complement each other, each other.
    I can work with this.


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