Sunday, February 27, 2011

Online and Long Distance - Real Love Story

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So this is my story.

I met Atala on a message board in 2007. He was an anonymous commenter, just like I was. I was more open so most regular commenters knew I was from Asaba, and that I lived in Edinburgh. He was this aloof guy, very very private. I was impressed by his intelligence, and how helpful he generally was to the members of the board, old and new. With time, we began to exchange banters on the site, and I found out that he was also based in the UK. He was a volunteer on the site, and when I also joined the team, we got a chance to work together, and I was further bowled over.

I'm a firm believer in going for what I want and when I became single later that year, I reached out to him with a personal message to wish him Happy Christmas. He replied that he had recently moved to the US, and my heart sank. I didn't believe in long distance relationships, especially with someone I hadn't met first. So I tried to put him out of my mind and look out for other options.

I went to Nigeria for Easter, and organised a meet-up with fellow message board members. The pictures of the party were circulated on the forum, and a few days later, I got a message from Atala. He said he knew I would be deluged with admirers and just wanted to get in line. That was such a corny line, but it got me. Still, I took about a week or so to think about it. I liked him, but he still lived in the US while I was in the UK. Anyway, I told him to send in his application, and that started a witty introduction.

Our communication moved from the forum's private messages to emails, phone calls and web cam, and it was as if we'd known each other for ever. Our conversations lasted hours, and we would speak everyday, and still exchange emails. However, after three months of this, I mentioned that what we had wasn't serious as I hadn't met him. He pulled back then, and we decided it wouldn't work.

I missed him like hell, but had to get back to my life, what I called real life as opposed to online life. We stopped calling each other, and kept our distance on the board. However, just over a month later, I noticed that he seemed to want another chance. He sent a message and I told him to call if he wanted to. My phone begun to ring immediately. Honestly, my heart melted then.

We spoke for longer than we ever had that night, and he said he was willing, ready and able to give a relationship with me his all. I had never stopped caring for him, but I knew I couldn't do an LDR if we did not meet. He said he would do something about it. A week later, he sent me his itinerary for a flight he booked to visit me a month later. I was like OMG, I couldn't believe it was happening.

It almost didn't happen. About a couple of days to his visit, he said something that almost spoilt it all. It was an emotional night, and when we got over that, I knew for certain, he was THE ONE. Meeting him at the airport after that was so exciting, and emotional too. I was scared though, what if he didn't like me? What if we didn't hit it off? All my fears were unnecessary. He stayed with me for a week, and it was beautiful.

He visited two more times in the next three months, and by then, we were talking marriage. On the second visit, we picked out an engagement ring together, and I organised a party for him to meet some of my friends formally. I thought the proposal was going to be nothing special, I was expecting it after all. But he surprised me. He got down on one knee, and sang a beautiful song he'd composed specially for the occasion. Words cannot describe what I felt.

Atala often says he's not a romantic, and he's certainly not a textbook one. But who needs textbooks when you can write your own? We didn't want to share the private emails, or the song he proposed with, but he agreed to write this poem which captures how he felt then, and how he still feels now.

The rising sun after the darkest night,
The comforting hand after a fearful fright,
The healing force that stills a raging blight,
None of these compare to having you in my life.

A sparkling jewel set in a golden crown,
The dazzling smile that lifts a brooding frown,
The wings that bear aloft when one is plummeting down,
All these are but naught to having you in my life.

For a long time my world was seen in shades of grey,
Then you happened, and all my clouds were chased away;

So I'll pass up on wealth more than a sum I could name,
Keep stepping when tempted by the trappings of fame,
Don't care about playing the power and prestige game,
I'd forsake all of these for having you as my wife.

{Personal pictures removed}

And this my beautiful people is how we wrap up the month of love. I hope others are as moved and inspired as I am from all the different glimpses of what has worked and how love can be. Thanks to all those who shared their stories with us this month. And special thanks to all those who have been consistent with comments.

I look forward to March, and wish everyone the best!
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  1. I know i'm on a self imposed blogsville ban, but this made me smile (esp d poem n i don't like poems) and i just had to comment.


  2. awwwww... this is so romantic .... ☺☺☺♥♥.

  3. Awww your very own story! How cute is that Myne? Continued blessings to you and him. lovely

  4. A brilliant end to the month of love.
    I really enjoyed reading your story, Myne and must say I'm intrigued you met online.
    I've been wary of online dating due to a very bad experience a friend had, I'm really pleased it's worked out for you guys.

    I loved Atala's poem. I pray your love continues to blossom and grow with each passing year.

    I'm already looking forward to reading new stories next time so I hope this is a permanent feature on your blog otherwise I'm stealing the idea for my log next year! Consider yourself warned :o

  5. Myne, that gele is stunning!
    Only the brave can work an LDR to marriage, God bless you both.

    P.S: I enjoyed chapter 20, now looking forward to the whole book. *wink

  6. wow, wow, wowzers!
    Like moving from anonymosity to an LDR to marriage!
    That's a good one.
    Happy married life, so far anf many more years for you!

  7. short of words

  8. I can't believe that worked- this relationship was like, against huge odds.

    This is really sweet Myne!


  9. Thank you for sharing! It just shows when something is meant to be, it defies all odds.....Online love can be for real!

    I enjoyed February's love stories, a job very well done ma'am.

    *Thumbs up*

  10. Aw, Myne. How sweet. LDRs work if both parties are committed. Same as NDRs. Great story to wrap the series up with, wishing you continued joy in each other's presence, and many children. Thanks for doing this series, and for sharing my story too. Looking forward to 2012.

  11. Beautiful story, Myne. One could say you are living what you write about: r-o-m-a-n-c-e. And jolly good at it too:)

  12. awwww...beautiful story myne!!

  13. Sting is not supposed to be any where on blogsville...what are you doing commenting.

    Myne: Before reading this, I said to my self, I have read the story before. But now I get to read another side of it and I loved this.

    May God bless marriage and thank you for sharing all the wonderful stories

  14. Ahhh! Love this!
    THanks Myne for posting this. You got me smiling and inspired, in a time I have been feeling like there is no love again.

    I am curious though, what kind of message board was this? What was the theme of it?

    Bless your marriage..beautiful story. I want to read up on the other ones as soon as I have the chance. Sorry I have not been around, I have been in over my head...

  15. Really lovely and i must say i love the pix.... been out of the blog community for a while so didn't know about your love stories... i would have loved to write mine... anyways maybe i can write a piece on my blog. do take a peep...

  16. Awww Myne, the poem is so sweet.
    I luv ur story its so cute...its the perfect story for a dedicated writer like you...

    luvly, absolutely luvly #frenchaccent

    I'm going to miss this love fun.

  17. beeeautiful! Am pretty sure all the stories were very inspiring.

    Am glad u added urs in tho!

  18. Thank you all so much! And AMEN to all the prayers o, I claim it. :)

    @Adaeze, the message board was mostly politics, and serious issues. But it could be versatile too, and some softer issues had their own space. I hope you find your way back to love.

  19. Anything can happen if you believe and give Love the chance to grow...Love is real. Happy for you.

  20. Yet again, Myne, you have inspired me.....:) thanks!.......

  21. A beautiful end to this month ...May you both continue to find happiness every second of every dy. Amen!

  22. Such a beautiful story. Thanks for sharing it.

  23. Aww this is awesome! The poem is amazing!!!

  24. Chineke! lol

    Una dey love oh, as a friend of mine would say.


  25. I'm addicted to your love stories Myne. Awesome

  26. LOL...Thanks Waffi, how you dey?

  27. Awwwww...this love thing eh! Just beautiful!!

    Great Job on co-ordinating all the stories!!

  28. aaaaaaawwwwwwww this story is so nice. and it reaffirms my words that internet love can work if you just let it happen rather than go searching for it :)

  29. AWWWWWWWWW....what a beautiful way to end the series!!!!

    *thumbs up*

  30. This is really lovely Myne! Just beautiful. Sigh..

    May God continue to bless you and Atala's marriage. Amen...

  31. I'm a hopeless romantic!Awwwwww and I love all the stories you've done for this month.

  32. What a story...MW.
    Congratulations, and wish you all the very best always!!

  33. Hi Myne *waves*

    What a beautiful story, wish the BF would write such poem for me :D

  34. Hi Myne,even a blind man knows he's a keeper and i'm really happy for you.Nice story and i'm happy it's yours!

  35. Thank you all so much, and especially for the payers, Amen! :)

  36. Err please Myne could u help me with the link to the Cupid's Risk blog? Thanks :)

  37. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
    I actually started tearing up while reading that poem.
    I especially love your love story because even though it started online and you were hesitant about the whole LDR situation, the result showed that LDRs are possible once the two people involved love each other and choose to make it work.

    Thank you so very much for this series, i'm sure it has brought many smiles to many faces and also rekindle hope in many a heart.

    God bless you Myne.

  38. Myne I don't know what to say but one thing is I GIGGLED and jumped in my bed. Who says Love isn't a sweet thing so May the Lord who instituted marriage make yours and others ‎​you shared here brighter to the perfect day amen.

    God bless amen

  39. This is exactly how i met my husband, its something yo cant really believe.

  40. @Mischif, awww...thank you dearie. It is indeed possible. I say a big Amen, it has really been a pleasure for me too.

    @Enobong, Thank you!

    @Kiky, really? There you go...I wish you both many more years of love and happiness.

  41. All these stories made my heart sing. To love is to live.

  42. Lol Yes Myne! I remember this story! Made me smile then, makes me smile now.

    Wish u guys many many many more blessed years ahead.
    Dang! need 2 catch up on all these love kinda stories :)

  43. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww I had goose bumps reading this.

  44. what a way to end it! God bless you Myne. You wrote it from a fresh perspective this time that I almost didn't know its your story again. haha.

    You know Mayowa had that fear too? What if he doesn't like me? What if he sees me and I don't meet his 'requirements' and all? Sometimes you ladies think too much. hahaaa

    God bless you, Myne.


  45. just reading this now ...awwwwwwwwww
    so beautiful

    Atala, my egbon! you do well o! wish both of u many more years of happiness and no Junior Mrs Atala! (Myne I got my eyes on

  46. when will i tell my own story naaaaa? God bless u two.

  47. Thank you all...

    @LDP, we have to think that of course, it's not easy.

    @Aloted, lol...we hear you.

    @Fragile, very soon you'll be pleasantly surprised.

  48. All, thanks for your wonderful, wonderful comments.

    I'll just say that it was the one conversation that we had that made me make up my mind fast that I would be a fool to let Myne slip away, no matter the distance... two years and counting, and I'm glad I made the choice!


  49. Myne, this is beautiful and a wonderful way to wrap the month...requited love is beautiful and the stories you have shared have shown us that we can find love in different ways and in different places...

  50. Thank you Rita! it was really a pleasure reading and sharing the different stories.

  51. WOW! This is a good icing on the cake! What a way to cap the love stories featured so far!

    I like the poem! May your marriage continue to blossom in the LOVE and GLORY of the Almighty God!

    Beautiful wedding gown!

  52. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww this is so beautiful that am forced to comment! I pray you both continue to live in love, today and always....Amen!

  53. so these things happen? cool

  54. Someone summed it all up here. Against all the odds. im so proud of the both of you!

  55. Awwwwww....! Really, like you said, forget textbooks. Lovely and uplifting.


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