TIFU is a category on Reddit where commentators share confessions [Today, I F_cked Up]. Over the weekend, a man posted about how his life is now messed up, saying "TIFU by reading my wife's text messages. She's cheating on me." Simply known as MyLifeSuxNow, the mystery man first shared about the messages that blew a hole in his marriage, and then as his wife arranged to meet her lover, he decided to a live blog about the on-going affair.
Continue reading for how he confronted his wife Jenny on cheating with a man called Zack after he hired a private investigator to follow her and monitor her phones and devices.
Read First - Man Finds Out His Wife's Cheating By Reading Her Text Messages
Alright, so Jenny and Carly got back from the hotel. I had my devices cleared, and everything looked normal. My brother and I were sitting on the couch watching TV. Jenny opened the front door, and Jenny and Carly walked in. It started with normal "hey huns" and "I missed yous". They took off their shoes near the door, and Carly went over to sit next to her husband. Jenny just walked up to me and hugged me for a good minute or two. I won't lie, it felt good forgetting about everything and just wrapping each other in our arms. She didn't smell different, so it was easy to forget about the whole affair situation.
She pulled out of the hug, and kissed me like she did Zack for a few seconds. I pulled away and said "what's up?" She looked away, I could tell she was beginning to cry, and started sobbing. She got all teary eyed, I almost felt bad for her, and she said "I'm so sorry honey". I played dumb and said "what happened?"
She asked me "Carly didn't tell you?". I said "no". She told me that she had to makeout with some guy (Zack) and that if she didn't he would let out a dirty secret of hers. I asked her what was the secret and she wouldn't tell me. I told her "is that all you did? A few kisses isn't that bad if he was blackmailing you. It's ok."
I asked her "what about the weekend get away?" You didn't go on a trip or anything?" She said no, she had only gone to a hotel where the guy wanted to meet up for some kisses.
Carly clearly looked uncomfortable during this, she kept looking over at us, as if she wanted to say something. I turned to look at Carly, and this is when the truth started to come out. I already knew Jenny had sex, I was playing dumb. Jenny said "we did a few other things but that's all." I asked her to tell me what she did. Jenny said she played with Zack's penis, and touched it a little.
Give me a break. I got more aggressive and frustrated with her lying and asked her "are you sure that's all you did?" Jenny then told me she had to have sex with him just to please him. I grew tired of her giving me tiny bits of the information, so I asked Carly what happened.
Carly told me that Jenny told her they were going to a lodge in the mountains for a weekend. Jenny told Carly that I didn't want to miss the football games, so I was gonna stay home and it was gonna be a fun weekend for them to bond. This is believable, they are best friends. Jenny then took them to Zack's house and she forced Carly to keep her mouth shut or she would tell my brother that Carly was cheating. She showed Carly where she would be in case something happened to her, and dropped Carly back off at the hotel. Carly said Jenny went back to Zack's place for a while, they did something, and came back later with a guy she didn't know. Jenny then had some more sex with Zack while Carly just spoke to the new guy that Jenny brought over. They had a few drinks and went to bed. They dropped them off at their houses, and now they came back home.
False. Bs. Carly lied, she never mentioned meeting X at Starbucks, or the Coffee shop trips at all. My brother was growing more and more frustrated with the lying, so was I. I told Jenny and Carly to come with me. I sat them down at the dining room table and asked them to give me the whole truth, as their stories didn't add up.
That's when Jenny started bombarding me with "why don't you trust me?" and "we're married, we're supposed to trust each other through thick and thin". Wrong verse. Carly started to give dirty looks, and she repeatedly rolled her eyes. It's was like I was speaking to toddlers. Jenny was furious, she walked into the kitchen, got a bottle of water and slammed the refrigerator door. My brother heard this, he came over and sat down with us.
The four of us were sitting at a table. My brother and I knew most of the truth, Jenny and Carly knew the whole truth. We had to get it from them.
Jenny started sobbing hysterically. Carly followed. They both cried for 10 minutes maybe, without talking. Jenny came over and hugged me and sobbed into my shoulder. I was gonna miss holding her for sure, she still felt like the same non-cheating person I knew before.
Jenny sat back down and told me the whole truth. Jenny and Carly had made up the whole trip. They wanted to have sex with other people for once. She hooking up. They went over to the Starbucks so Carly could meet the guy she had been seeing for a while prior. Jenny grew paranoid that she was being followed by me and started driving around in circles. She then went back to the shopping center to pick up Carly. X had something to take care of and said he would meet Carly later at the hotel. X is a friend of Carly's and Jenny's. Carly and Jenny then drove to the hotel they were staying at to eat some food.
Later, they went back to the car so they could drive over to Zack's flathouse. Jenny ran over to the car because again, she was paranoid I was following her. They drove over to Zack's house after many turns because she as paranoid I was following her. Jenny showed Carly where she would be if anything happened. Jenny then drove Carly back to the hotel. Carly waited up there for Jenny, Zack, and X to come over. Jenny went back over to Zack's house and they made out in there. They also had sex.
After a while, Jenny and Zack went to the shopping center to pick up X again. With X, they went back to the hotel where they were going to have sex. As I guessed, Carly got cold feet and didn't want to do it. Jenny and Zack however did have sex, multiple times. Carly ratted out Jenny right away so she wouldn't be involved with anything. They all had a bunch of drinks and got drunk. After Jenny and Zack had sex once more, they went to bed. Carly and X hung out all night, nothing romantic except for hand holding.
They woke up, ate food, dropped everyone off at their houses (kissed Zack), and drove to the Coffee shop. There they talked extensively about what the would tell us to cover up what happened. They got too confused and just decided to wing it. They went back to the hotel, got their things, and checked out. They left out the part about driving to the gym/grocery area, and said they just drove home. Instead of lying, they broke down and couldn't do it so now they're admitting what they did. They also didn't say anything about the person they talked to on the phone outside the hotel.
So, from what they told me, Jenny had sex, Carly did not but was going to. I don't know what to believe. Jenny again, hugged me and sobbed into my chest, ruining my shirt. Carly cried, but didn't approach her husband.
My brother had a look of relief on his face, but also slight anger. He scolded them about lying for maybe 15 minutes, then again about how badly they had hurt us, and they cried more. I was furious. I thought what we had was great, she never once showed signs of wanting to hook up with other people. I asked her how long this had been going on and how they were meeting each other, but she didn't say anything. After a few more minutes of crying, she said a few weeks, that was the first time they had sex. I was devastated, but I understood that this is what she wanted. Sure, she played with my feelings, but she's not a person fond of commitment at heart. She wants to sleep around, and that's fine with me.
That's just not happening when we're together, so I'm continuing with the divorce process. Fuck her. My brother and Carly talked in our bedroom. There was tons of yelling and crying on both parts, and they came out after 20 minutes. They looked like they had made up, and they went home. I was upset, Jenny kept telling me we could work through this, she didn't want to lose me, and that it would never happen again. I just left the table and went back to watching TV. She started yelling at me about how I was betraying her and that we are life partners and we can't divorce. She came over and tried to sit on top of me in a cute way, but I rejected. She got all pouty like she normally does when she's upset and went upstairs to use the restroom. Holy mood swings.
That's when I wrote that quick update. I told Jenny that we'd talk about it later tonight, and that I was still on with my friends to watch the football game. She pleaded to me one last time, but I wasn't budging. She said she had a date planned for us and I'd have a sexy surprise waiting for me for when I got back. She winked at me and said sorry, I walked out the door. I didn't say anything about the investigation I have going on.
Here I am, at my friend's house. They're clearly enjoying the game, I'm writing a depressing and devastating story on Reddit. Still on with the lawyer tomorrow morning.
Thank you all for the support these past few days, it has meant a lot to me. I'll post an update on what happens with the divorce lawyer, one about what happens when I get back home, and I might post a complete update post on everything on Monday/Tuesday @ r/relationships.
I'll retrieve call and text logs to find out who she was calling when they were outside the hotel.
Either way, my head is spinning and I don't know what to think about all this. There are so many questions that need answering. My brother is supposedly fine now, I'm still devastated. The next few months will be tough, but I think I can get through it. Jenny is at home alone now.
EDIT: Forgot to add Jenny has texted me 13 times to "come home" and "she misses me".
EDIT 2: I'm probably done updating for tonight, I'm not feeling up to it. I'll read and reply to some comments, but I can't get to all of them. Goodnight guys, thanks for the support
EDIT 3: (12:56pm) 1/19/2015 Hey. So my sexy surprise last night was pretty terrible. I walked into the house pretty pissed and Jenny had literally everything I like prepared for me. My favorite meal, the outfit of hers that I liked, etc. I didn't know what to do, this felt so many like some of our old nights together that we loved.
I didn't give in sexually, but I was pretty hungry. I sat down with her and we ate, pretty much in complete silence. She had the nerve to ask me "are you still upset with me?" I just looked at her, and she knew it. I finished eating and started heading upstairs. She chased after me, grabbed my hand, and once again, cried into me. Although this wasn't a whole bunch of tears like earlier, she was still sad.
You know, throughout all this, I still see flashes of the person I used to love so much. They way she walks, the mannerism when she brushes her hair back, etc. I realized, this is just her way of guilting me, I'm not gonna stay with someone who I can't trust, second guessing everything they tell me. I told her to "leave me alone, we'll talk some more tomorrow."
I go through my routine and go to bed, where she is waiting for me with one last attempt to have sex. I finally told her "this isn't happening, and you know it. You have Zack on speed dial, call him if you want a quick fuck." Out of rage, or maybe to prove that she doesn't love him anymore, she smashed her phone on the floor. She said "I told you I don't like him anymore! I want to be with *you** and only you!* Our bedroom floor is carpet, so her phone didn't break but the sim card and battery flew out which made it look bad (a.k.a cracked back). I told her to "pick up your fucking phone and stop bothering me, I'm trying to go to sleep. You should've thought about our relationship when you went around sleeping with other people".
More crying, and she fell asleep that way. I fell asleep afterwards, and we didn't have sex. I woke up this morning at 5am without waking her, hit the gym for an hour and went to the divorce lawyer. He has told me to not tell her anything about the PI investigation or anything else involving the divorce. He thinks it would be wise if I thought this over thoroughly, as after divorce it would be tough to go back. He told me to give him a call when I was ready to move forward. I received a copy of the prenuptial agreement, and we read it over. It's still valid (thank god). He didn't have much time to speak with me since he shouldn't have been in office for MLK but he has me and one other client early and he wanted to go back home.
I'm planning on calling him tomorrow morning to move forward with the process, there is no way at all I'm staying with Jenny. After the meeting, I texted my brother and asked him how things were going. He said "about back to normal." Well, good for him. It's weird, I'm happy for him, but I kinda wish I had a partner to go through this with me together. It's tough getting a divorce, but I'm not a bitch and I can get through this.
Jenny texted me this morning asking "where are you?" a few times. I didn't reply. I'm at home now, it's pretty awkward. She's trying to set up a movie date with us tonight, and I keep rejecting.
To clear up a few things: Some people are telling me I'm bragging on these posts. I never said I have a huge cock, never said I was insanely attractive, never said I'm filthy rich or have a great job. I don't consider myself above anyone at all. The only reason the sexual details were included is because it's a common reason to divorce. A lot of divorces are over sexual dissatisfaction.
And, thank you all for the support. There is no way I'll be able to read all these replies and PMs, but I'll try to reply to as many as I can. There will probably be a couple more updates here, and I'll post another update thread in a few months on how I'm doing and how the divorce went.
Again, thanks for the golds, but this is a throwaway as I've mentioned. It'll make it much easier to read comments, so thanks!
TL;DR: She cheated, Carly got cold feet and didn't cheat, I'm getting a divorce, my brother may not be.
Read Also - [Read Final Updates] Man Deletes Liveblogs on Wife's Cheating & Initiates Divorce