Sunday, January 4, 2015

Dakore On How She Met & Married Husband, Cutting Dreadlocks, And Getting Back To Acting

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Nollywood actress Dakore Egbuson-Akande took some time off work when she got married and this gave rise to a lot of rumors that she was done with the profession. However, in a new interview, the mom-of-two explains that she did it so as the find the right balance to managing her home and her career.

Another rumor that has also trailed the actress since her marriage was that she married her husband, Olu Akande – son of Ibadan-born billionaire, Chief Harry Akande - because of his money. In this interview, Dakore opens up about how they met and married for love, and goes on to discuss her return to acting, cutting her hair, and being a wife and mother. Read excerpts from her interview below...

On how she met her husband: 

We met in Lagos. I just relocated from London and he just returned from Chicago. We got talking because he wanted me to present a television show. I did not get the job but I did get the dude. It was work-related but we found out we connected. We were friends for a while before we started dating. Then, I was not out for a date. I liked him for his confidence and he gave me my space too. He was a real gentleman and well-spoken. When it was time for the engagement, I knew it would happen, but I did not know when. I knew what it was like to make a mistake because my parents were not together and I needed to be sure. I was career driven but not driven about marriage.

How he proposed:

The proposal was really nice. He got down on his knees and proposed and people were emotional. Shortly after that we got married. We had Ayomide, our first daughter who is now three, and Dasola who is 10 months old now.

On celebrity marriages being easier or not: 

Celebrity marriages are not different. The only reason is that people are looking at you. The challenges are the same but are amplified in celebrity marriages. That puts a lot of pressure on the union. The first thing is to marry your friend. You have to marry for the right reason. I married for love; someone I am totally in awe of and respect. It is difficult, but when you have God, there is a balance that cones with it. It is fun and challenging. It is easy to get frustrated but people need to remember their vows.

On how her husband feels about her media presence:

“He is a little more reserved than I am and he is confident in himself. Though he understands the nature of my job, he does not feel threatened by my exposure. However, I have learnt to be more inclusive because I was in the klieglight alone. Now, I introduce him as my husband when we go out together. We have a three-way conversation and I learnt that by being with him and he also learnt that he has to step aside sometimes. He understands me, we try to stay mindful of each other and support each other. I appreciate that a lot.”

On rumors surrounding her marriage:

“They peddled all sorts of stories-His parents did not like me and that I quit acting. But it’s not possible that I would be married if my father-in-law did not like me. I was not even 40 years old yet and people started calling me an ex-actress. It was hard for me! But I decided to live my life and I stopped paying attention to maintain my sanity. How could anyone think I would quit my job because I got married? They said this because I married into a wealthy family, but I still have my purpose and goals that I want to achieve.”

On why she cut her dreadlocks:

“I made up my mind that I wanted to wear dreadlocks, and when I was tired of it, I decided to cut it. My husband did not want me to cut my hair; he wanted our children to meet me with the hair. I dance to the beat of my own drum and my path is different from every other person’s. I have my own mind; if I let people shape my opinions of myself, I will not be authentic to myself.”

On coming back to the movie industry:

Yes, I have been off the screen for a few years now, but I am gradually working my way back. It is not easy to be away from work and everybody knows; but when you are back to work it is still hard for everyone to know. That is partly my fault because I have not granted interviews – I am very wary of the press and my words have been taken out of context. I have been busy working on various things including working with the United Nations.

On balancing work and family:

It is extremely difficult, I do not know how women make it happen but somehow we make it happen. I just take it one day at a time and try not to be too stressed. I learnt to plan ahead and that is the only way. I have a great support network in my nanny, mum and my husband because sometimes when I am not present with the kids, I have to make sure there is someone competent to do that. It is tough because when i am out all day and i return home i still have to be a mum and a wife. I am thankful that there is more meaning to my life as opposed to when I was single and in the movies.


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