A male chauvinist Nairaland user posted these 9 reasons in his opinion why he believes African women and Nigerian women in particular do not get married. Most of it hinge around controlling the personality and activities of the women, and elevating the status of the men.
Supposedly, African men are looking for househelps and slaves, and many women these days refuse to demean themselves and that is why they are not married. I read it and shook my head, good for the women then, right? We women need to keep our heads high and live self-fulfilling lives. However, on second thought, maybe there are women who actually think like this? I decided to share it here, so you my dear readers can decide if you agree.
1. Many African ladies will end up singles for life because of media exposure- it is so disheartening how a lady will glue her eyes on a mobile phone from morning to night, only to raise it up to focus on television to watch another celebrity entertainment channel. Tell me, what else will dominate this lady’s mindset aside how to live a fake celebrity life being promoted on television channels?
2. Many African ladies now dislike cooking and home chores just because they had been totally brainwashed by movies showcasing men playing the role of women in a family, and due to excessive exposure to modern media that promotes gender-equality in a destructive way that’s aimed at destroying the unique African family setting that made our previous African marriages everlasting and envious to the westerns. Now, with this attitude, how do you expect a African man to desire to marry when he knows he is only buying more headache and trouble than helper for himself?
3. Excessive makeup turns most decent and serious-minded men off- if you have observed, you will discover that most men dislike excessive makeup, and more don’t even like it at all; reason they often times discourage their true loved ones to do away with it cos it speaks ill of a lady even though so many men will applaud and complement you for looking like an Egyptian mummy. A slight makeup is okay; but if you are out for marriage, try always to look simple and natural, it will attract better men, decent and serious-minded, except you are still living in your high school life and not thinking towards marriage.
4. Stop Giving Your Number Out To Every Dick & Harry! No man would want to propose marriage to a lady whose phone is always talking and laughing with un serious calls. You may not be a playgirl, but he would judge you as one, and will likely flee at the slightest chance or disagreement.
5. You Don’t Bring Any Value Into The Life Of Men You Date or Are Dating- because your best friend married without contributing anything to the man that finally married her, doesn’t mean it will work for you that way. Think, work towards equipping yourself so that you can be a value and also add value to his life to convince him that you are worth committing to. Adding value to his life isn’t by giving him money, or material gifts, nope….good counsels, being his best friend, helping him attain his goals in life, lending him moral, mental and spiritual support, and by not just being a liability that only bring requests and problems to be solved.
6. Your Friends Run Your Life- how do you expect to find a husband when you still allow your clique of friends to be dictating which man you meet is worthy of your love and which is not? When will you wake up and face the fact that those your best friends even though they cherish you, wouldn’t want you to marry before them or to marry the best man?
7. You Give Everything Out During Dating- As a single lady who has not been taken to the altar, you need to reserve some things for your husband to be, especially your body, respect it and preserve it at all cost. In the past, men rushed to marry to get certain things or privileges they had been constantly denied while being single. Such privileges include and not limited to: constant s*x and companionship, good food and tidied home, etc. But today, a single man gets even the best and of course more of constant s*x, good food and excellent home-keeping more than his married counterparts, so tell me how the hell you want him to desire to marry you when you have given him virtually everything he desires from a wife while being his girlfriend? And the most painful part of it all is that he knows that you are prepared to cut down on s*x supply, cooking, home-keeping, etc once he marries you, so why would he not want you to remain his girlfriend for life?
8. You Package Yourself Wrongly- in your attempt to look sexy, adorable and maybe appealing to guys, you have derailed from appealing to appalling. In fact you look more whorish than modest; more unattractive than attractive, and more disgusting than adorable. Your dressing style determines who gets attracted to you most times. If you dress high school, only high school-thinking guys will be attracted to you, and if you dress excessively sexy and provocative, only randy men will come to you for urgent satisfaction of their immediate s*x urge, so don’t be fooled by media hyping of certain kinds of dressing, they are meant for certain set of ladies you wouldn’t like to be associated with, be careful. Remember, not all clothes that look sexy are good for a seriously searching for a soul mate single lady.
9. You Lack Manners, Character, Wisdom and Good Home Upbringing- definitely, your ‘hot girl’, ‘pretty girl’, ‘sexy girl’ looks will win you so many men; both the good, and the bad, but your inner beauty, your character and manner are the things that will determine whether any of those men would stay or run after accomplishing their evil missions. In order words, do away with nagging, being possessive, challenging with men in negative ways, the mentality of ‘what a man can do a woman can do better’, a lie devil has used to deceive and destroy so many ladies today, please do away with it.